Best Funny Short Jokes

Dirty Short Bar Jokes Handjob Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren’t enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, “I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job! Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, “That’s funny, I dreamed I was skiing! After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, “Damn, I wish I had a flashlight! The woman says, “Me too, you’ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes! He said there would be no excuses for not showing up tomorrow, barring a dire medical condition or an immediate family member’s death. One smart ass, male student said, “What about extreme sexual exhaustion? After the laughter had subsided, the teacher glared at the student, and said, “Not an excuse, you can use your other hand to write. The officer stops and approaches the guy. The guy sobs, “I was driving and picked up a hitchhiker.

BEST. SHORT JOKES. EVER.

Partners Funny Jokes Rolling top 10 Funny Jokes from around the world, updated daily and archived here for your ongoing enjoyment. We’ve got hundreds of funny jokes below to get you laughing. Short jokes, sport jokes, relationship jokes through to political jokes our audience have contributed some absolute stunners and they’re all below, just click on through! New jokes are added daily so make sure you bookmark this page. He’d never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the RR tracks, he heard a whistle, but didn’t know what it was.

–Always offer to bait your date’s hook, especially on the first date. –No matter how broke you are, never take your date flowers that were stolen from a cemetery. –Be .

Dirty Jokes Part V A teenager is walking downtown and a girl whispers to him, “Blowjob, five dollars”. He gives her a strange look and keeps walking. Soon another girl does the same thing. Confused, he keeps walking. The first thing out of his mouth when he returned home was “Mom, what’s a blowjob? His mom replies “Five dollars, just like downtown!

A woman walks into the store and purchases the following: She then goes to the check out line. Oh, you must be single Woman: You can tell that by what I bought? No, you’re fucking ugly!

Getting Old Jokes, Hilarious Short Quotes, Funny Life Quotes

A beer short of a six pack. A brick short of a load. A couple of eggs shy of a dozen. A couple of gallons short of a full tank. A few ants short of a picnic.

Relationship Jokes – Large collection of relationship jokes, love jokes, single jokes, couple jokes, and new relationship jokes.

Clean short funny jokes Funny one line jokes about dating, relationships and marriage to make you smile. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband! Marriage is give and take. My wife and I always compromise. How do most men define marriage? A very expensive way to get your laundry done free. Words to live by:

Short People Jokes One Liners

Well, maybe except really funny short jokes. Reading some good jokes can kick your day off with a laugh and a smile, and why not do just that? To help you we have made a compilation of some of the best of the great jokes and funny one line jokes that we know – on all sorts of topics from short funny jokes to great jokes about countries to dating jokes to jokes about alcohol and much more.

To kick off the page, we present: The Jewish Samurai – In days long past, a Chinese emperor needed a new samurai to be his personal bodyguard. He sent out a message to all the lands summoning the best warriors to his court in three years time.

26 Hilarious Jokes About Dating That Single And Taken People Can Laugh At is cataloged in Dating, Funny, Humor, Jokes -jokes-4/ Dating Jokes – My Blog [ ] 26 Hilarious Jokes About Dating That Single And Taken People Can Laugh At Funny jokes | comedy central jokes, Comedy central jokes – tons funny jokes & share: dirty jokes, yo.

I also had a LOT of you climbing onto your roofs just to sing my accolades. That to me is a good day of blogging. She carried her little joke books around and loved to make people laugh. Her favorite joke was the one in the image above. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into it. I never have awesome jokes. I like to make humor on the fly.

Clean Jokes and Humor: Laughter Really Is the Best Medicine

Because it only has one arm. What is red and drifts over a desert? What is the tallest piece of furniture? Last words of a highly poisonous snake? What is blue and smells like red paint?

Absolutely hillarious flirty one-liners! The largest collection of flirty one-line jokes in the world. All sorted from the best by our visitors. See TOP 10 flirty one liners.

What do you give the blonde who has everything? How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she’s pregnant. A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, “I slept with a Brazilian How many is a brazilian? What do you call a skeleton in the closet with blonde hair? Last year’s hide-and-go-seek winner.

Jokes and Stories: Just Plain Funny

Getting Old Jokes Hilarious Short Quotes, Funny Life Quotes Did you hear about the 83 year old woman who talked herself out of a speeding ticket by telling the young officer that she had to get there before she forgot where she was going? More getting old jokes below Your little black book only contains names ending in M. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.

Catfishing isn’t funny when it happens to you, but it is funny when people make jokes about it on the web. One hilarious comic shows an unimpressed woman opening the .

Deductive reasoning is a lot simpler than many people realize. Just see if it isn’t: I see you have a dog house out back. By that I deduce that you have a dog. Do you have a dog house? Five surgeons were talking about the best patients First surgeon says, “Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything on the inside is numbered.

Everything inside them is in alphabetical order. Everything inside them is color coded! They’re heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and butts are interchangeable. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end.

Funny Jokes at

Funny reasons why men are different from women. Men are from Mars, life is good to them, and we gals love them. Fathers say the darndest things. If you don’t use your head, you might as well have feet at both ends. Funny Jokes and Quotes About Money 75 jokes and quotes. I’m really good at managing money.

Home › Marriage Humor › Archive for Dating Jokes. Blog Archives Bad Date Joke Posted in Dating Jokes, Funny Stories, Relationship Jokes. Advertisements. Categories. Best Jokes (12) Funniest Jokes (1) Short Jokes (23) Text Jokes (15) Sports Humor (10) .

Know a good profession joke? Share it with us here. Profession joke – A priest A priest tells the prayers: The good thing is that we have money for the repair of the church. The bad one — the money are still in your pockets. Profession jokes – Judge A judge tells: Would you like to say anything? Profession jokes – School mates – Hi, so great to see you — what do you do in your life? Funny profession jokes – Opinion Question: What would you describe the term “exchange of opinions”?

That’s a situation when you have your opinion and go with it to your boss.

Dating Comedy: Frank Lucero Jokes About Dating! – Stand Up Comedy